Circle Around like the Moth

So, likely no one is here right now, but that's ok.

Life has changed so much since my last post. Which I might actually read here to just compare.

I am shocked at how much can change in one evening.

With Shon's accident this has catapulted so many changes into orbit.

I moved back into technology for my career.  True that it isn't as high of a level of work than I was doing before, but it is more social than before.
The people are good people.  Not as anchored together as my former positions either, but still kind nonetheless.
It is strange to not do anything with counseling, energy work, astrology, reiki or the like.  I had energy work done on me for the first time since befor his accident. It felt warm and nurturing. I had forgotten how it felt.

Shon has passed unexpectedly as was his accident of course.  We all expected after the initial ICU that he would make it.  I mean, you are out of the deep water right?  Only strange situations have people die unexpectedly.  We are not the norm it seems.  I am learning to live without him.  I am both in the relearning myself phase of being out of a very long term relationship and also in a mid life transition.  I wouldn't call it is a crisis, unless you mean crisis of creativity.

I am finding myself stifled by beige. By boring.  By safe fashions and closed off relationships.
Having him pass has blown open my sense of desiring safety and now I feel like I hunger for color, and nature and openness. I used to shy away from whimsy, but now I crave it. Like need it like in waterfall amounts.

Anyway, just rambling for now, but I want to reembrace this forum more, even if I am talking to myself.

Ciao for now!